Welcome Spring :)

Feeling a tad better than my last post couple mths back. I am currently working on my disability paperwork ( fuck this is a wad of info boooooo) and what you say can and will be held against you on the app approval and in the future. For someone like me that also has big time memory issues filling out minor paperwork is exhausting. It is a constant worry doing / redoing / anxiety over the top.

I have had the paperwork since Jan and have come up with every possible avoidance. I now have about a week to complete it OMGAWD 😦  Knowing this paperwork will help me in ways that would be so beneficial forevermore OR go completely sideways wrecking my life is not helping.

I 1st had an appt with the legal advocate and she helped me and directed me to my doctor to complete the rest. My shrink and the advocate had encouraged me to do so.  I go to my shrink with it like I was advised and he poo-poo’d it sending me off to do more mind-work  for filling it out which IS MY PROBLEM IN THE 1ST PLACE.  I can’t even fill out a simple form without having it checked over and they want me to fill out this like 30 page detailed mess? FML.

Once done I have to go back to the shrink for his part and hope he is satisfied with whatever I get done….then back to the legal advocate. I’m in a flap just writing about it 😦

^^^^^^ Other than that crap I am not doing so bad. My shrink sent me away last time with some anxiety med. I have anxiety about taking the anxiety med and being too waffled to fill out my paperwork so I have not started it yet LMFREAKING Bum off. So absolutely ridiculous but at least I know it. I know it does not make sense but I am ok with that.

The lovely weather has gotten me outside more doing my gardening and I started some other artwork that has been used to avoid the paperwork lol

Hope ya’ll are doing ok too!!!! 🙂


About Bemused

Adult onset rapid cycling Bipolar II, PTSD, Agoraphobic, Social anxiety disorder...triggered by a Trauma in 2010. I am also estranged from my immediate family. Complete Dog-Nerd.
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